2 posts tagged “doh”

2. I do embarrassing things on purpose. My sister dragged me into a Christian book shop today. I don't much like the shop as everyone in there looks like their dog just died and they're not particularly helpful. Where are all the happy Christians? Anyway.. I'm bored and I don't particularly want to be there so I stand in the middle of the shop near the counter, turn to my sister and in a loudish voice ask "Where do you think they keep the Korans in here??" My sister nearly died, the shop assistant looked at me like I was some kind of alien. I looked straight back at her and raised as eyebrow as if I was honestly expecting her to answer my question. I was ushered out of there within a few minutes by my sister as they didn't have what my sister wanted either. Not before I got to check out the snake skin covered bible though. What's up with that??

3. I tend to trip over a lot. I haven't actually hit the dirt in several years and I dread to think what damage I would do if I did as I'm not as light and bouncy as I used to be. But I usually stumble over things or threaten to fall over. I was looking for my supervisor last week, she wasn't in her office so I stuck my head in the staff room. I planted my right foot at the door and leaned in, not holding onto anything but to keep my balance my left leg instictively came up behind me to counter balance me. The thing is.. I leaned too far so suddenly my face started to move towards the floor and my left leg kept getting higher behind me. My right thigh protested that it hadn't been stretched that far since I was about 7 so I did this little hop forwards to stop myself taking a header. The little hop landed me squarely in the middle of the staff room. It wouldn't have been too bad if everyone was sitting where they usually sit as only one or two people would have seen me and I could have beat a hasty retreat. Unfortunately, half the people in the room were sitting on the couches which were on my right.. and they were conversing with the other half of the room, which were either sitting at the table or standing at the coffee machine, either way they were on my left. So my little hop landed me squarely, doing my best ballerina impersonation, with my left leg in the air and my head down near my right knee and arms flung out to balance me, in the middle of the conversations. Had I thought quicker I could have said "Don't mind me" and hopped back out. Or, I could have stood up and done one of those gymnastic bow things they do at the end of their routines. Unfortunately, I'm not that quick so I smiled sheepishly and walked out to a chorus of giggles from my workmates.

I'm sure there's plenty of other reasons not to take me anywhere but they're all I can think of at the moment. I'm sure Dylan will remind me. :-p